The stress of buying gifts for everyone, the visible competition that seems to be going on behind closed doors of each family; the amount of money spent yearly, and the lack of humility. It just makes me sad.
I come from a poor background, and I'm sure many of you can relate to my struggle growing up and living from paycheck to paycheck. At some point, life seemed to be falling into place, but out of nowhere, every thing came crashing down. My family lost cars, houses, money, jobs; one thing after the other. But we had each other, and we counted on friends and people that gave us hope in humanity and helped us through those tough times. Christmas at home was just another night, and that was when I remembered the traditions happening in Mexico at the same time as other families here in the USA exchanged gifts. Now, these are two entire different cultures, and I understand the fact; it is also a religious event. As catholics, the people in my small town celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ by going to church, hosting the posadas, and enjoying of our friends and neighbors; I guess the food and complimentary goody bags are our version of gifts, if you must make an argument, but the goodies tend to remain a constant traditional candy, cookies, nuts, fruit, and the container that you'll put them in.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I miss the traditions in my hometown; we surely stick to them here in the USA, but it is not the same. Someday, I will be able to afford going back, filming, and showing you how big of an event it is.
Then, I opened my eyes, and the reality hit me again: there was no food in our fridge, some times we didn't have heat, but we had electricity and a roof over our heads; we improvised as we went along. The rough times made us stronger, and kept us together. Once things started to look up, we still didn't get presents under our tree because we didn't have a tree either; but we did have food, and I think that was more than enough.
At some point, I made a promise that I'd never fall into such trend of buying gifts and indulging others in this crazy financial cataclysm, and for years, I never bough anything for anyone. Then again, I also had personal rough times during the winter, so I spent the 'holiday season' hating everything and everyone. The past four years though, life has changed. Thank God!
My anxiety and 'ugly days' still linger, but the financial situation has improved. Maybe it has something to do with growing older, moving out on my own, having to put myself out there, and pushing myself to face reality head on. I do buy presents now, for my immediate family only though; I believe we deserve it after years of not having this luxury. I still don't want to get into that over-the-top gifts situation, and I can't afford them anyway, so I get them clothes. These are things that they will surely use, and let's face it, I got really good taste in clothes lol
This year I was also very excited about the whole tree, lights, ornaments, the music, and the company of my family and friends. Especially their company, and the food that comes along with it. As usual, the 24th we spent it at my mom's, we had our favorite dish, we watched a movie, and I took a nap in between. Then, the 25th, for the first time we hosted the dinner, and Mitch cooked delicious meal for his family. We exchanged gifts, we had some awkward silences, and we laughed it off, I drank the whole bottle of wine that my boss gave me, and we cleaned up after a successful night. It was a great holiday season, if I may say so.
While I wait for the day that I can visit my hometown, and share my culture with Mitch in my native land, I will share his culture here, and be grateful that I have come this far. Life is about lessons, and no matter how hard we'd had it, it gets better with time and hard work.