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| 2014 |
It was on my thirteenth birthday when I wrote my first journal entry. It was a notebook that Grandma bought here and took it to Mexico for me; it was the perfect gift. Besides the $1 chapstick that she gave me, but that's a whole different story that I'll probably tell you later.
I went under drastic changes during my teenage years, and I saw myself losing control over my life. And it was the time when I needed an outlet to my feelings and thoughts that I started jotting down in that notebook about my mixed emotions. Ever since, for almost over a decade now, I have been keeping track of my life in paper; amounting to seven backpacks full of notebooks that I have filled out with every detail of my upbringing. From my experience with eating disorders to my decision to come to the USA; from the first ESL class to my first college paper, and everything else in between. I love the fact that I can open up a notebook and all my dirty little secrets will pour out; I love the fact that I can look back, read about the tough times, and remind myself where I come from. It keeps me grounded and humble.
As I grow older, my life adventures have diminished. My life has become much of work, home, repeat; and I am not complaining, I enjoy my life. My point is, I really don't have much to write about in my journals anymore. So I started this blog, to share my life experiences with you, friends and strangers that happen to run into this. My journals are personal, I will be buried with them (okay, probably not, but they will continue to remain private); but this blog has given me the opportunity to reflect on my life, choose the event that I want to share, and that's what I do -hoping that my mistakes serve as a lesson for someone to learn from, and avoid making the same decisions. I am not a life coach, and I am not telling you how to live your life, but if anyone is lost and my experiences makes them feel like they're not alone, then my mission will be accomplished. Also, as I told a friend recently (when she asked why I am obsessed with blogging), it is therapeutic for me. Everyone have their own way to cope with stressful situations in life, in my case, I write. So it is my outlet, just as my journals were an outlet at some point, this blog helps me to sort out my mind.
With that being said, I am not an example to follow either. I am just someone that wants to help you up when you need it. I do not intend to show off any of my 'accomplishments' either, if I have any; but I do want to highlight the things I've done for myself. I would like to call it a spark of hope, if my crazy ass can do it, so can anyone. We just need to keep on trying, never giving up, and we can do whatever we set our mind to. And that's why I continue to write, even if nobody is reading.